Christmas Shopping

In a court, a judge asks a culprit.
Judge: Tell me, what are you being presecuted for?
Culprit: I was doing my Christmas shopping too early.
Judge: But that's not a crime. How early were you
             doing your Christmas shopping?
Culprit: I were doing that before the store opened.

"timeless"

timeless (adjective)

- not appearing to be affected by the passing of time or by changes in fashion

Their work have a timeless quality.

""stupefy"

stupefy (verb)

- to surprise or shock sb

She was stupefied with the weather in Europe.

etc.

 etc - end of thinking capacity

The Secret to Remembering Vocabulary

Check this one out, guys! :)

"implore"

implore (verb)

- to ask sb to do sth in an anxious way because you want or need it very much

She implored him to stop playing the music.

A Minute Job

A dentist is trying to pull out the patient's tooth. While doing his job, his patient asks:

Patient: How long will you pull my tooth out?
Dentist: Don't worry, it will take a minute for me
              to pull your tooth out.
Patient: And how much will it cost me?
Dentist: Just $100.
Patient: For a minute job?!
Dentist: If you prefer, I can pull it out for one hour.

"sinecure"

sinecure (noun)

- a ob that you are paid for even though it involves little or no work

Although we all thought the job as a sinecure, William took his position seriously and always worked late into the evening.

"absent-minded"

absent-minded (adjective)

- tending to forget things, perhaps because you are not thinking about what is around you, but about sth else

My friend's becoming absent-minded since he got crash yesterday.

"not get/have a wink of sleep"

not get/have a wink of sleep (idiom)

- to not be able to sleep

I didn't get a wink of sleep because I saw a shadow in the kitchen last night.

A ticket for what you think

A police stopped a man on the street.

Police :Hey! You were speeding.
Man   : No, I wasn't.
Police : Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
Man   : Hey! I was driving just fine.
Police : You can tell that to the judge.
Man   : Would you give me another ticket if I called
             you a jerk.
Police : Yes, you would.
Man   : What if I thought that you were a jerk?
Police : I cannot give you a ticket for what you think.
Man   : I think that you are a jerk.

"speeding"

speeding (noun)

- the traffic offence of driving faster than the legal limit

The man was fined $200 for speeding.

"pamper"

pamper (verb)

- to take care of sb very well and make them feel as comfortable as possible

Pamper yourself with our new range of relaxation treatments.

"reign"

reign (verb)

- to be the best o most important in a particular situation or area of skill

He still reigns in the field of classical music.

"affluent"

affluent (adjective)

- having a lot of money and a good standard of living

Many people dream about affluent life in Indonesia.

What's happened with me, Doc?

A woman comes to a doctor and complains:

Woman: Doc, please help me! When I touch
                my head, it hurts. Then, when I touch
                my stomach, it hurts. The same thing
                also happens when I touch my leg.
Doctor  : I know what has happened to you.
Woman: What's happened with me, Doc?
Doctor  : You have a broken finger.

"fulsome"

fulsome (adjective)

- too generous in praising or thanking sb, or in saying sorry, so that you do not sound sincere.

She was fulsome in thanking her classmate for sharing the workbook together.

General English Course (25 Januari - 18 Maret 2015)

Guys, yuk gabung dan belajar bahasa Inggris di CEIC! :)

My Name Is "benefits"

I'm going to change my Facebook name. I think "benefits" is a good name. Then, when someone adds me on Facebook, it will say, "you are now friends with benefits."

Marriage Certificate

Husband: Honey, what are you doing?
Wife        : I'm reading our marriage certificate.
Husband: What for?
Wife        : I'm looking for the expiration date.

"zillion"

zillion (noun)

- - a very large number

This movie is zillion time exciting than the one I watched yesterday.

Manager's Command

Manager  : What are you doing here?
Employee: Of course, I'm executing your command.
Manager  : But I haven't told you anything.
Employee: So and I do nothing.

"claque"

claque (noun)

- a group of people who are paid to clap or boo a performer or  public speaker

The claque at the comedian show shouted enthusiastically.

A Job Interview

Interviewer: Did you enjoy your last job?
Interviewee: Yes, I did.
Interviewer: Why did you leave the job?
Interviewee: The company was relocated and
                      they did not tell me where.

"umami"

umami (noun)

- a taste found in some food that is neither sweet, nor salty.

Tomatoes have lots umami.

Water Polo

Simon: Hey, why do you look so sad?
Daniel: I tried water polo yesterday.
Simon: It must be exciting, right?
Daniel: Yes, you're right but my horse drowned.

"expiate"

expiate (verb)

- to accept punishment or sth that you have done wrong in order to show that you are sorry

He was given an opportunity to confess and expiate his guilty about stealing somebody's wallet.

"foist"

foist (verb)

- to force sb to accept sb/sth that they do not want

The title of his thesis was foisted on him by his lecturer.

Where were you born?

A: Where were you born?
B: I was born in Florida.
A: Which part?
B: All of me.

"innocuous"

innocuous (adjective)

- not intended to offend or upset anyone

The speech was not innocuous and got more attention from the audience.

"foodie"

foodie (noun)

- a person who is very interested in cooking and eating different kinds of food.

As a foodie, Dave gets excited whenever a new restaurant opens in the area.

Good or Bad?

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.

Doctor: I have a good news and a bad news for you.
Man    : Okay. Tell me the good news first.
Doctor: The good news is, you still have 24 hours to
              live.
Man    : Oh no! If that's the good news, then
              what's the bad news?
Doctor: The bad news is, I forgot to call you
              yesterday.

"confidant"

confidant (noun)

- a person that you trust and who you talk to about private or secret hings

There were times when a semi-stranger was a better confidant than a close friend.

Outdoor Activity: Fun with Foreign Friends

Kali ini CEIC mengadakan suatu Outdoor Activity yang gak kalah seru dengan sebelumnya. Yeah, Fun with Foreign Friends memberikan kesempatan bagi CEICers untuk berbagi dan bertukar budaya dengan teman-teman dari negara lain. Kegiatan ini dilaksanakan pada tanggal 9 Oktober 2015 di area Lembaga Bahasa Universitas Sanata Dharma... see more

You're the Next

A fried of mine told me something. When he was young, he didn't like going to the weddings. His grandmother would tell him, "You're the next." However, his grandmother stopped doing that once he started saying the same thing to her at a funeral.

"gadfly"

gadfly (noun)

- a person who annoys or criticizes other people to make them to do sth.

He was a political gadfly, turning up at city council meetings and complaining about the waste of taxpayers' money.

"ebullient"

ebullient (adjective)
- full of confidence, energy and good humor.

The children were accompanied by ebullient tour guide.

The Wedding Ring

A: Aren't you wearing your weeding ring on the
     wrong finger?
B: Yes, I am. I married the wrong woman.

"queue"

queue (noun)

-a line of people, car, etc, waiting for sth or to do sth.

I had to join the queue for taking a bath.

"ruddy"

ruddy (adjective)

- having a healthy reddish color

Jim's ruddy complexion was intensified after a brisk walk in the cold night air.

God Is Good

Man: God, how long is a thousand years?
God: To me, it's about a second.
Man: God, how much is a million pounds?
God: To me, it's a penny.
Man: God, may I have a penny?
God: Wait a minute.

"astute"

astute (adjective)

- very clever and quick at seeing what to do in a particular situation, especially how to get an advantage

She was asute enough to realize what George wanted was her money.

"consternation"

consternation (noun)

- an amazement of dismay that hinders or throws into confusion

Mr. Jones gave a pop quiz on the first Friday of the school year due to the consternation of his students.

A Sentence Beginning with "I"

Teacher: Jack, tell me a sentence that begins with "I".
Jack      : I is the...
Teacher: Stop! Don't put "is" after an "I"
                Put "am" after an "I".
Jack      : Okay. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

"druthers"

druthers (noun)

- free choice or preferences

If I had my druthers, I'd be relaxing at the park this weekend instead of cleaning out my kitchen.

Who Found Australia?

Teacher  : Susan, please point to Australia on
                  the map.
Susan     : This is it.
Teacher  : Great job! Now class, who found\
                 Australia?
Class      : Susan did.

"rigmarole"

rigmarole (noun)

1 - confusing and meaningless talk

She turned up an hour late with some rigmarole about catching the wrong bus.

2 - a long and complicated process that is annoying and seems unnecessary

I couldn't face the whole rigmarole of gettinh a work permit again.

The Perfect Son

Adam: I have a perfect son.

Bryan: Does he smoke?

Adam: No, he doesn't.

Bryan: Does he drink wine?

Adam: No, he doesn't.

Bryan: Does he ever come home late?

Adam: No, he doesn't.

Bryan: I guess you really have a perfect son.
            How old is he?

Adam: He will be seven months old next Sunday.

Outdoor Activity: Ramadhan Movie Club

Kali ini CEIC mengadakan Ramadhan Movie Club sebagai Outdoor Activity pada periode kursus yang ketiga tertanggal 29 Juni 2015 di Ruang Seminar LPPM, Universitas Sanata Dharma. Konsep kegiatan ini adalah menonton sebuah film sekaligus berbuka puasa bersama. Tujuannya agar CEICers bisa lebih akrab dengan teman-teman kursus lainnya dan para instruktur di bulan ramadhan... see more

Outdoor Activity: Gamezone

Gamezone merupakan bentuk Outdoor Activity yang diadakan oleh CEIC dalam periode kursus yang kedua. Kegiatan ini dilaksanakan pada tanggal 26 Mei 2015 di area Lembaga Bahasa Universitas Sanata Dharma. Dalam gamezone, CEICers dibagi kedalam dua belas kelompok dan semua kelompok harus menyelesaikan dua belas pos permainan. Tujuannya adalah CEICers bisa bermain dan belajar bahasa Inggris di setiap posnya salain mengumpulkan poin... see more

Outdoor Activity: Wall Magazines Exhibition and Presentation

Wall Magazines Exhibition and Presentation adalah kegiatan Outdoor Activity yang diikuti oleh CEICers pada periode program yang pertama, yaitu pada tanggal 27 Februari 2015 di Ruang Koendjono, Gedung Pusat, Universitas Sanata Dharma. Dalam kegiatan ini, CEICers dibagi kedalam dua belas kelompok berdasarkan jumlah kelas pada periode pertama. Setiap kelas berkesempatan untuk memamerkan dan mempresentasikan majalah dinding kreasi CEICers sendiri... see more