A ticket for what you think

A police stopped a man on the street.

Police :Hey! You were speeding.
Man   : No, I wasn't.
Police : Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
Man   : Hey! I was driving just fine.
Police : You can tell that to the judge.
Man   : Would you give me another ticket if I called
             you a jerk.
Police : Yes, you would.
Man   : What if I thought that you were a jerk?
Police : I cannot give you a ticket for what you think.
Man   : I think that you are a jerk.

"speeding"

speeding (noun)

- the traffic offence of driving faster than the legal limit

The man was fined $200 for speeding.

"pamper"

pamper (verb)

- to take care of sb very well and make them feel as comfortable as possible

Pamper yourself with our new range of relaxation treatments.

"reign"

reign (verb)

- to be the best o most important in a particular situation or area of skill

He still reigns in the field of classical music.

"affluent"

affluent (adjective)

- having a lot of money and a good standard of living

Many people dream about affluent life in Indonesia.

What's happened with me, Doc?

A woman comes to a doctor and complains:

Woman: Doc, please help me! When I touch
                my head, it hurts. Then, when I touch
                my stomach, it hurts. The same thing
                also happens when I touch my leg.
Doctor  : I know what has happened to you.
Woman: What's happened with me, Doc?
Doctor  : You have a broken finger.

"fulsome"

fulsome (adjective)

- too generous in praising or thanking sb, or in saying sorry, so that you do not sound sincere.

She was fulsome in thanking her classmate for sharing the workbook together.